Taming the “Inner Voices” in our Heads – the Key to Success in College and Beyond

By Brenda on January 20th, 2012



We all have inner voices in our heads that call the shots. Not actual inner voices, but the inner dialogue that serves as our conscience telling us what we should and shouldn’t do. Or more likely, what we can and cannot do. Each of us has a voice that serves as a “coach” that calls the plays that dictate our lives. Sometimes the coach is supportive, encouraging yet demanding. Other times the coach is abusive, demeaning, and hurtful.

We all have our own “coach” that only we can hear. Other people have their own coach that only they can hear. How can we tell what type of coach a person has? Someone dominated by the abusive coach, also known as the inner judge, are noticeable because they come off as fearful, insecure and indecisive. People who are controlled by the Inner defender are often defensive, insecure, and angry. Then there’s the inner creator. That’s the voice that is encouraging, empowering, and full of courage.

We all have these three voices speaking to us. The key is to shut up the inner judge and inner defender and let the voice of the inner creator shine through. If you only listened to the inner creator think of how successful you would be in college and life in general.

These inner voices are formed by past experiences as well as the influence of different people in our lives. The voices are basically formed during childhood. So how can you tame the negative voices and let the inner creator be heard louder and more often? It starts with awareness.

The first step is to identify these three different voices, which we have done. Once you know they’re there, you can begin to choose which one to listen to and which ones to drown out. It is very important to take inventory of which one is the predominant voice in your life – the judge, defender, or creator. You’ll be able to tell which voice has the lead role in our life by how you react to situations – particularly stressful ones.

Begin to notice your reactions and then stop listening to the defender and judge. Begin to listen to your inner creator and your actions will fall in line with that voice. The result is a happier, wiser, and more successful student.


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